By Christine Cioppa

They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away. Now new research shows that regularly performing mind-body relaxation techniques (e.g., yoga, meditation, prayer) may also keep your physician away.

The study, published by PLOS, shows that patients who received mind-body training to build resilience and counter stress, were 43 percent less likely to need health care services.

Stress is connected to 70 percent of doctors' caseloads, the researchers note, as it is behind many conditions, from depression and anxiety to headaches, back pain, insomnia, gastro-esophageal reflux disease (GERD), irritable bowel syndrome (IBS), and chest discomfort.

“I like to think that there are many gates to wellness. However, not all of them are easy for everyone right away,” says study researcher James Stahl, MD, CM, MPH. “The choice of which one works best to start depends a bit on the person. The most important element is regular practice.”

To get started, “take control of a piece of your time. It can be in the morning, before you go to bed or some other time during the day in which you can devote to yourself and your own practice. It can be as little as 10 minutes. It just needs to be consistent,” says Dr. Stahl. “Mind-body skills are not expensive—you are born with the tools. Seeking a coach of one sort or another can be helpful. You can also get started with online material, like that offered at the Benson-Henry Institute.”

For more information check these resources:

http://www.bensonhenryinstitute.org (Benson-Henry Institute for Mind Body Medicine)

https://nccih.nih.gov/health/meditation/overview.htm (National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health—meditation)

Analysts expect holiday sales to be solid. But retailers, they say, won’t be hiring many extra employees to manage the flow of customers.

Every fall Challenger, Gray & Christmas, Inc., a global outplacement consultancy, releases a holiday hiring outlook. This year the firm expects retailers to hire only the same amount of staff as last year, roughly 755,000 nationwide from October to December.

For comparison, the largest holiday hiring boom came in 1999 when retailers hired an extra 850,000 to manage the gift shopping crowds.

However, less positions do not mean you necessarily will have to fight for a job.

So, if you are looking for extra work this holiday season, where do you find it?

Probably not in the traditional places. Currently, the nation’s unemployment rate is at a seven-year low. The Wall Street Journey reported last month that large retailers and delivery services are struggling to find enough employees to fill their warehouse and distribution centers.

The problem is expected to trickle down to delivery services such as United Parcel Service Inc. and FedEx Corp.

The upside to this – employers are more willing to work with staff who can only work certain hours. And, some firms may be offering as much as $2 more an hour this year, the newspaper reported.

UPS plans to hire 95,000 seasonal employees this year, nationwide, with a base starting salary of $10.10 an hour. Last year FedEx hired 50,000 additional workers nationwide and Amazon hired more than 80,000.

The report by Challenger, Gray & Christmas points out that most holiday jobs are not in retail store fronts as cashiers but in these backrooms, warehouses and shipping facilities.

For more information about holiday jobs with nationwide delivery services, check out these sites:

http://www.amazonfulfillmentcareers.com/opportunities/warehouse-associate/seasonal-fulfillment-associate/

http://www.fedex.com/co_english/contact/jobs.html

https://www.jobs-ups.com/

http://www.snagajob.com/c/seasonal-jobs/

By Amanda Rebmann

You’ve closed on your new home using the VA mortgage.  Congratulations!  The 30-year, fixed-rate mortgage is an affordable product for military families.  Since the rate is fixed, your payment is always going to be the same, right?

Not quite. 

While it’s true that your principal and interest (P&I) payment will remain the same, the amount your lender collects for your taxes and insurance may increase or decrease on a yearly basis. And that can change the amount of your monthly payment.

The calculation your lender uses is based on the amount they paid for your taxes and insurance over the course of the year.  For the most part, increases shouldn’t be too painful; a slight increase in taxes or insurance won’t alter your payment too severely.  However, if you purchased a house in a rapidly appreciating neighborhood, you run the risk of a re-assessment dramatically increasing your taxes, which will eventually result in a higher mortgage payment.

VA Loans, like most other loans that carry a low down payment, will require your lender escrow for your taxes and insurance.  It’s an extra layer of security for the lender to protect against default.  If they maintain control over paying of taxes and insurance, it eliminates the risk of the house going to tax sale, or insurance lapsing. 

By law, once a year, your lender must analyze your escrow account to make sure they are holding an appropriate amount of your money.  If they are holding too little, your payment will increase.  If they are holding too much, they will refund the overage back to you.  First they look to see how much they paid out over the previous year, divide that number by 12, and that is your new deposit amount. 

The next step is verifying if they have too much or too little in your account.  They determine when during the year, your escrow account will reach its lowest balance.  This usually occurs after a large tax bill is paid out, or several items are paid out at once.  At this “low point,” most states allow the lender to maintain a two-month deposit “cushion.”  So, if your monthly escrow deposit is $250, your lender is allowed to have up to $500 at this point.  Anything over that amount is an “overage” and they are required to refund it back to you.  Anything under that amount, a “shortage,” your lender will divide by 12 and add to your escrow payment.

Although rare, increases can be dramatic and may put a strain on your ability to pay.  In these cases, you can request your lender spread your shortage over a longer period of time, instead of 12 months, perhaps 24.  Although there is nothing they can do about your regular monthly deposit, spreading the shortage over a longer period of time may help you recover in the short term.

The bottom line is to account for escrow increases when deciding how expensive a home to buy.  The sad truth is taxes are far more likely to go up then down, so you should consider purchasing a home in a slowly rising mortgage payment as the years go on into your financial planning.

The end of pregnancy is wrought with exhaustion and constant urination.

Insomnia coupled with intense sweating.

Cramps and pain and waddles.

It’s not a miracle; it’s a nightmare.

I crave things I’ve run out of room to eat.  I’m cranky and irritable.  I just want a nap and a marathon of some cheesy reality series and cheesier snacks.

But my children don’t care or humor me in the least, and neither does the Navy.

My husband isn’t home to help anymore.  And this baby is coming soon.  Very soon.

But not soon enough.

It’s not fall down here in the South yet.  My legs sweat like sausages in a pan when I leave the house wearing anything but maternity underwear. Not to mention that nothing fits.

And the crying.  Oh, the crying.

My daughter is doing a school lesson on sea turtles, and we watched several YouTube videos of the hatchling turtles digging out of their beach nests and wiggling their tiny turtle bodies down to the sea foam before being swept up by the ocean waves.

And I cried the tears of joy I couldn’t control because they were just so cute.  And little.  And they were trying so hard to beat it down to that surf.

My hormones are out of control.

So, in fact, a total nightmare may be an understatement.

I’m just grateful it’s almost over.  But I’m also scared of what this birth will look like.

Without my husband’s support and the added burden of my daughters.

Plus, because it’s my third baby, I am simply not ready.  Tiny onesies aren’t folded.  Blankets aren’t washed.  I need a little more time.

It’s enough to bring on the tears again.  It makes me thoroughly confused and emotional.

It’s all very muddy these days, these end of pregnancy days.

So I may be miserable, but it’s true.

 I’m not ready yet.

Tropical Storm Joaquin has become a hurricane and is barreling towards the east coast today. Eleven  states, stretching from Appalachia to New England are under flood watch.

And in those states there are likely thousands of military families, who PCS'd there this summer and have never had to prepare for a hurricane. If this includes you, you should start preparing, now.

www.ready.gov/hurricanes provides a complete checklist of everything you need to know about hurricane preparation and evacuation. The site even provides a list of what you need to be doing when the hurricane is 36 hours from arriving, 18 hours from arriving and six hours from arriving.

The organization's most basic preparedness tips:

• Know where to go. If you are ordered to evacuate, know the local hurricane evacuation route(s) to take and have a plan for where you can stay. Contact your local emergency management agency for more information.
• Put together a disaster supply kit, including a flashlight, batteries, cash, first aid supplies, and copies of your critical information if you need to evacuate
• If you are not in an area that is advised to evacuate and you decide to stay in your home, plan for adequate supplies in case you lose power and water for several days and you are not able to leave due to flooding or blocked roads.
• Make a family emergency communication plan that includes discussing a safe place everyone will head to during the storm and how your family will keep in touch if communication systems are out.
• Many communities have text or email alerting systems for emergency notifications. To find out what alerts are available in your area, search the Internet with your town, city, or county name and the word “alerts.”

You can also follow the progress of storms by visiting the National Hurricane Center's website at http://www.nhc.noaa.gov/

The PCS move is over, now it is time to prepare for any emergencies in your new region. Don't wait to prepare for major storms. Hurricane season runs until the end of November. There is a lot of time left for a major storm to hit.

By Mandy Rebmann

A couple of months after closing on our new house, my husband had a troubled look on his face. He was working on the monthly budget. 

“So, how soon can you go back to work,” he asked.

I knew it was coming. I had already been working on getting a job with my old company, which I was lucky enough to do.  Hello paycheck. Goodbye stay-at-home mommy, “free” child care.

Figuring I would be going back to work, I had already registered my little one at the daycare on post. I knew we would be put on the wait list.  The DC-area is notorious for its waitlists for daycares and preschools; they are expensive and hard to get into, particularly for infants.  With the wait for a two-year-old being 4 to 6 months, I knew I’d have to arrange an alternative while we waited.

Word of mouth among the other military spouses sent me to the U.S. General Services Administration’s (GSA’s) childcare subsidy program for federal employees.  Particularly for us, the Army Fee Assistance (AFA) program helps working Army families by reducing the cost of off-post child care if on-post care is not an option.  The program buys down the higher costs of non-installation childcare to what you would pay on post.  The Army believes programs like this positively impact readiness and retention by minimizing conflict between work (mission) requirements and the home.

Who Is Eligible?

• Families of Active and activated Reserve Soldiers
• Department of Army Civilians
• Wounded Warriors
• Survivors of Fallen Soldiers

The spouse of those eligible must be working, actively looking for work, or enrolled in school.

AFA Program

• Parent Responsibilities- After determining eligibility, parents must complete the application (paperwork), meet the requirements and enroll with a qualifying provider.  They must sign all invoices and attendance forms (more paperwork) to certify child care given, and pay the provider their share of the costs.  They must also immediately report any family or financial changes to the provider and GSA (even more paperwork).
• Provider Responsibilities- Providers must meet AFA’s licensing and accreditation requirements to maintain participation in the program and receive payments directly from the GSA.  

The GSA works as third party administer for the Army determining eligibility, providing payments and acting as customer service agent for parents and providers.

Fee assistance may be full-time or part-time determined by the status of the spouse.  If the spouse works more than 25 hours a week or is enrolled full-time in college (or a combination of work and school), the family would receive full-time eligibility.  The spouse may also be in the first 90 days of looking for work.  Part-time eligibility can be determined by working between 16 and 25 hours a week or being enrolled in school part-time.

How Much Do I Pay?

• An Army-approved fee calculator determines the amount of fee assistance for each family by taking into consideration total family income, employment/school status of the spouse, and hours of care. 
• The “provider rate” is an amount calculated based on geographic location that is comparable to the rate paid on post by families of similar income.  This amount is paid directly by the family to the provider.
• The provider then bills the GSA for the difference and is paid directly.  The payments are then made directly to the provider.

Simple, right? 

I should note the website currently warns there is a three month backlog in evaluating applications, but is retroactively providing benefits.  So the benefit is there, but it is not a seamless process.  But at a time of skyrocketing child care costs, it’s worth the time.

Alpha, Bravo, Charlie and Delta.

Most military members and their families can say the military phonetic alphabet just as easily as they can sing the alphabet.

But Alpha, Bravo, Charlie, and Delta aren’t just part of the service member’s vocabulary.

They are also names given to service member’s children.

Charlie, meaning “free man,” has been among one of the top 1,000 names for baby girls since 2005, and much longer for baby boys, according to the Social Security Administration

Charlie, though, isn’t exclusively a military name.

But Ace is.  And it’s been in the top 1,000 names since 2010, according to the SSA.

So has Garrison, which has been in the top 1,000 since 2012.

Still, the names can get even more thematic, if you dig.

Bullet. Jet. Liberty. Jeep.

Major and Maverick, both listed as popular since 2010 by the SSA, and Roger, literally meaning “famous warrior,” which has been popular since well before 2000.

“The factors that parents typically consider when naming a child include family names, popularity of a name … religious names, ethnicity, and possible nicknames or rhymed names that could cause a child to be teased,” said Mallory Moss, co-founder of BabyNames.com.

Considering all those factors, it’s not shocking that some military families choose to use terms familiar and dear to soldiers, sailors, Marines, and airmen.

She said the popularity of a name – especially a military one – can work for or against a parent deciding to add some military terminology into a baby’s name.

“This could go either way,” she said. “Some parents want something popular, and some parents do not.”

Other traditional military names can carry a double meaning and become popular, though not for their original military association, she said.

“I think Benedict is an interesting name to discuss, as it is, military-wise, associated with a traitor, yet [the name is] becoming popular alongside the popularity of the actor Benedict Cumberbatch,” Moss said.

Military heroes, in particular, can provide great options for names and often do, she added.

“Names I would suggest from this list would include Nathanial, Patton, Creighton,” which is interesting and has the potential to become more popular,” she said, along with “Alexander and Colin.”

She dislikes the names Chester, Sherman, and Ulysses.  She also doesn’t like Jackson – and alternate spellings like Jaxon, Jacson, and Jacsyn - because it’s by far the most popular military-hero name and, therefore, over-used, she said.

According to the SSA, she’s correct.  Jackson has been a popular name since before 2000, peaking in popularity in 2013, when more than 0.5 percent of total boys born in the United States were given the name Jackson.

Also, “the boy names that are more military tend to be traditional, and traditional and Biblical boy names do tend to be the most popular,” Moss added, so it’s not shocking that so many families choose military-inspired first and middle names.

While the trends for female military names are much harder to track, we do know that using traditionally male names for females, like the aforementioned Charlie, is in itself its own increasing trend, she added.

So, when you’re naming a child, remember that you can’t control what happens to the popularity of a name, Moss said.

“Understand that if you pick a name that becomes unpopular, the child will be stuck with it for life,” she said. “Chester, I imagine, is one such choice.”

She recommends that, when picking a name, you make sure it sounds good with your last name.  She also said most parents should avoid a name that “means an adjective or a noun, like Kelly Green or Crystal Chanda Leer.”

And pay special attention to the fact that some names may be “easily teasable” and avoid those, Moss said.

You don’t want something too old-fashioned sounding.  And if you can pick something that lends itself to a nickname you like, that’s a positive too, she said..

“It’s hard to stop people from using nicknames without sounding like a jerk,” she said.

My dog-loving, allergy-ridden, feline-fearing husband bought our children a cat.

He had found a friendly kitten when he took the girls to a store where the Humane Society was having an event.  I was at a meeting, and he couldn’t get me on the phone, so with tear-stricken children, he left without her.

We were back by the same store the following weekend, and I told him, “Wouldn’t it be funny if she was still there?”

He maintained there was no way.  She was a sweet, pretty kitten who liked people.  We both expected she would be snatched right up the second he had left her behind.

Well, she wasn’t.  Due to a technicality, they couldn’t adopt her out during the event the weekend prior.

She was still there, mewing at the crate door and putting her tiny paw right up to the grate.

My girls remembered her, and they were in love once again.

And my husband took one look at me, sighed, and said, “OK.  Let’s do this.”

Two years of begging for a cat, and the women in this family had finally won.

Sweet little Elsa became her name, much like any pet adopted in the last two years into a house with Frozen fans.

And we loaded up the cart with litter, food, scratching posts, and all manner of cat necessities.  We were in.

Though I like cats, I have never had one.  And I’m excited to find out if what I suspected is true; I think I am a cat lady.

Of course, this means another living thing I soon have to keep alive during the next deployment.

We get to move next year, with three children, a dog, and now, a cat.

The kitten thinks she’s in a pack and wants to sleep with us; how do I train her not to, when we have a new baby snuggled in my lap for a midnight feeding in a few months?

How to break her heart when she realizes the man of the house deploys frequently, taking with him the broad chest she’s learned to cuddle on and purr at while he snores in a language she seems to understand?

Elsa, like the rest of us, will have to fit this funny little mold we fill as a military family.

Welcome to the pack, Elsa.  Hold on for a wild ride.

What time did your 12-year-old go to bed last night? How about your kindergartner? How about you?

We’re willing to bet, it wasn’t early enough.

While many schools across the country are posting flyers for after school activities, rehearsal schedules, test dates and reminders for money due, one school in Illinois is making a plea: put your kids to bed.

The elementary school has posted a chart of not just recommended hours of sleep, but a handy guide for what time your child needs to go to bed, based on the time they wake up in the morning.

And when you think about it in those terms, no one in your house is sleeping enough.

The National Sleep Foundation recommends that school age children through teens snooze nine to 11 hours each night. Adults need seven to nine hours, at a minimum.

If your seventh grader is at the table studying until 9 p.m. and wakes at 5:45 to catch the bus at 6:45, they are not meeting the minimum. And it is just not your child.

A National Sleep Foundation poll found 59 percent of sixth through eighth graders and 87 percent of U.S. high school students were getting less than the recommended 8.5 to 9.5 hours of sleep on school nights.

Throw in there several recent national studies that show teenagers’ brains do not function better until later in the morning and you have the makings of a very long, exhausting day for school kids across the nation.

And it shows.

The same poll found that 20-30 percent of high school students and 6 percent of middle school students fall asleep in school each day.

If your kids don’t hit the sack until later, you are up after them picking up, finalizing details for the next morning and trying to quell a mind that is turning with a very long to do list.

You are probably up earlier than everyone to prep breakfast, lunches, make sure shoes are by the front door and prepare for your own day’s work.

You have to stay up. You have things to do, right?

Nothing will go well the next day if you do not sleep.

Check the schedule put out by this elementary school. What time do you need to hit the hay? When that time comes, do it.

Homework is important. A clean kitchen every day is nice. But sleep is necessary.

During my husband’s worst deployment, in the midst of the surge in Iraq in 2007, I dreamed over and over that he had died. I had visions of what I would do if that happened, how I would react and how I would grieve.

Later, when he was deployed as a commander of nearly 1,000 soldiers in 2010, I had visions of a different kind: What would I do if one of our soldiers was killed, and I was called upon to help the spouse?

Thankfully, I never experienced either scenario in real life. And while death is something none of us like to talk about it (or should obsess about the way I did), we can be prepared in case it happens to one of our own.

Recently, a soldier in our current unit died of an illness after being in the hospital for a few days. My experiences helping his spouse and their five-year-old son over the past few weeks have reminded me that grief is one of our most primitive, yet most unpredictable, emotions.

Here are 10 tips for helping a military spouse deal with loss and grief, whether you are long-time friends or unfortunately meeting only because a tragedy has happened:

1. Everyone grieves differently, and that grief evolves over time. This is the most important thing to remember anytime you are around a person experiencing a loss. Some people retreat inside themselves. Others dread being alone. Some won’t leave the house for days. Others will find comfort in going out to do “normal” things.  If a grieving person reacts in a way different than you think you would, don’t judge them or question them. Let them grieve in the way that feels best for them at that moment.

2. This isn’t about you. This piggybacks on the above point – the only person this situation is about is the one who is experiencing the loss. If you find yourself seeking attention for your actions, or complaining, or talking randomly to others about the situation, step back and take a deep breath and refocus. If someone else is already providing assistance - like a close friend, neighbor or more senior spouse, ask them what you can do to help rather than overwhelming the grieving family.

3. Don’t intrude where you are not wanted or needed. Be very aware of when and how you can best support the grieving family. Again, this is not about you – if the spouse doesn’t want you there, leave. You do not have to be physically present to provide assistance.

4. If you are the one “in charge” of spouse support, assess the surviving spouse’s needs and discuss them carefully. A person in tragic circumstances may not know what they need, or how to express that need. At the same time, you don’t want to completely take over the situation. Talk to the spouse gently about her needs. Look around the house. Does she have kids who might need childcare while the CAO is meeting with her? Does she appear to have food on hand? Does she already have a support system in place that she can call upon (or you could call upon for her), like a church group or close circle of friends? Once you assess the needs, make a plan and present it to her. For example, a schedule of babysitters for her child or a plan for neighbors to walk the dog.

5. Call on others to help, and allow others to be involved as appropriate. When tragedy strikes, everyone wants to help. This is partly because we feel bad for the surviving family members, and also because it helps us deal with our own grief and fears. Organize that help accordingly, so that the family is not overwhelmed. If the surviving spouse doesn’t want people dropping by her house, by all means let her put a “do not disturb” sign on the door. Then corral the helpers into doing something useful and appreciated, based on the needs of the spouse. 

6. Let the military handle the “official” side of things. Don’t hypothesize with the spouse about money or benefits, timelines, or anything that the government controls. Whenever a servicemember dies, whether in combat or not, the immediate family is assigned a Casualty Assistance Officer, or CAO. The CAO is usually a member of the deceased person’s unit and is the point person for all official business related to the death. There are also usually several other members of the unit assigned to assist the CAO for as long as needed.  The CAO will help the family make burial or cremation arrangements, bring them necessary paperwork to sign and answer any questions they may have. He or she will also make sure the family is briefed on government benefits and receives any immediate financial assistance.  The CAO and the unit might also help with travel arrangements for other family members, the surviving spouse’s PCS if he or she will be relocating and countless other details.

7. You are not a professional grief counselor. Certainly you can be a sounding board and a shoulder to cry on, but be cognizant of the fact that most of us don’t have a degree in counseling. The CAO should provide information on mental health services but if you think a grieving spouse – or their children – might be in need of professional counseling, gently remind them that such counseling is readily available and, if necessary, give them the contact information. 

8. If you are stepping in because the person who died worked for or with your spouse, talk to your spouse about what he or she might expect of you and what assistance your own spouse envisions you providing

9. Don’t forget to take care of yourself and your own family. Helping someone in crisis is emotionally exhausting, and your own family, especially your children, may also be affected. Don’t get so immersed in helping someone else that you forget to take time out for yourself and your family.

10. Stop and think before you say or do anything. Back off. Don’t suffocate the grieving family. If there is any time to be compassionate, thoughtful and selfless, this is it.